Is it a Front Door Coat or a Back Door Coat?
Oh! You thought I meant rain coat, ski coat, trench coat, nice coat?
No. I mean is yours a Front Door Coat or a Back Door Coat. There is a difference you know. At least here there is.
The distinction arose after Christmas when I wore my brand new coat home from dinner and erroniously entered through the back door.
Flash, our overactive, Australian Shepherd kangaroo, has full access to the unfenced back yard thanks to a summer’s worth of invisible fence installation by Yours Truly and The Boys. She is the welcoming committee each time we come home, the Jack-in-the-box we have to frogger around in order to get in the house.
Upon exiting the car, we’re safe from being jumped on until we cross the buried wire 20 feet from the back door…and then one of two things happens:
- We sprint up the porch stairs and into the house in hopes she won’t notice we’re home. (wishful thinking, never happens)
- We get tackled.
When feeling positive toward Flash, I tell myself “she’s just giving me a hug!” But most days, I have visions of my fist connecting with her face each time she springs to eye level. (Don’t worry, I’ve never actually done it.)
Unfortunately, this time, I just flat didn’t think about the fact that the brand spanking new coat might be a problem…
…until she jumped on me and snagged it. That’s when, after escaping her “embrace,” leaping inside and removing the coat to survey the damage, I decided I must now have Front Door Coats and Back Door Coats.
The Front Door Coats are strictly to be worn out the front door. The invisible fence does not allow her to the front yard, and despite my love for efficiency (the car is typically closer to the back door than the front), I’ve either got to suck it up and walk seven more steps to the car in order to protect my Front Door Coats, or I need to make a change: park closer to the front door.
The Back Door Coat never really has left through the front door in the past, it’s not presentable enough to be worn anywhere except inside the barn or on dates with the goats. It used to be black, but is now a full spectrum of sunbleached grays. Although I don’t condone it, the Back Door Coat can be jumped on if need be with no significant change in its tattered appearance.
I am human though. When habit takes over, and I head for the back door, I literally have to stop in my tracks, look down at my wardrobe to determine the appropriate egress for the current coat.
It is a lot of work living in the country on a goat farm with a jumping dog. Little did I know my choice of coats would be part of the challenge.
– The Goat Cheese Lady