Day 114

Nine days ago, Day 114.  November 8, 2010.

Dottie + Urine and Semen.

It now takes 1 person to milk.  We now have a milk stand.  We have a fully enclosed and fully completed goat pen.  We even have a milking room.

And, we now have Dottie.  Urine and semen came with her at no extra charge.

No, I’m not kidding.

We bought her at the same time we bought Lucy, from the same farmers, about a month and a half ago.  But, we left her there to get bred one rather handsome fellow.

That is if you consider a giant wet river rat dredged in oil, grease, urine and semen with a long beard and a prominent teeth baring underbite handsome.

No.  He is absolutely hideous looking and disgusting.  But he makes babies and that’s the tradeoff we have to take in life.

And, he REEKS.  HE is the reason goat’s milk has a bad name.  HE is the reason people who tasted goat’s milk in their childhood have never recovered from the trauma.  HE is the reason people think goats stink.  HE and all other balls-intact males like him.


Why, of course, because of his perfume.  To attract the ladies, he pees all over himself.  But, as if that were not enough, he spreads semen on himself like frosting on a cake.  Mostly, you don’t want to go near him.

Because. if. you. do. YOU’LL SMELL JUST LIKE HIM!

So, back to Dottie.  She’s a very sweet goat and we picked her up yesterday.  And her odor.

Because she has spent the last month with Lickety Split (his name says it all…he’s good with the ladies, you know), she smells almost as bad as he does.  We only hope we get some babies out of it. 

The minute she entered the pen, the other three goats ran to her and smelled deeply, many times.  That’s as close as they’re gonna get to a buck for a long time.  They’re jealous.

And, now that she’s with Canela, Lilac and Lucy, they smell like her too.  And because I milk them, I smell like her too. 

My children find it rather odd to see me come in the side door almost completely undressed, but if I wear my milking clothes inside, my house will smell the same way. 

No, I don’t milk naked. 

Yes, I do disrobe on the deck to avoid contaminating the house with Lickety Split’s perfume.

– The Goat Cheese Lady

About The Goat Cheese Lady

I am Lindsey. At first I was a city girl. Growing up, the closest thing I had to farm animals were a cat and a cockatiel. In 2009, Herbert (my husband) and I bought our first milk goat and I instantly became an urban farmgirl, attempting to balance city and farm life..before I knew “urban homesteading” was a thing. That’s when we began The Goat Cheese Lady Farm, hence The Goat Cheese Lady blog you’re visiting now. After moving to the country in 2014, I embarked on life as a rural farmgirl. We continued teaching farm and cheesemaking classes, raising more goats and began construction on our cheese creamery. But life had other plans and in 2017, we decided that, due to financial and health issues, we had to close the farm for business. No more classes, no more creamery, a lot less milking. We went back to off farm jobs, I as an Occupational Therapist, Herbert in construction with his business, D&A Home Remodeling. At that point, I made a silent promise to myself that I would corral my entrepreneurial mind and focus on a job for a year. Well, it has been a year and I am back. Not to classes, cheese, soap or lotion, but back to writing. I love it. I’m not sure where it will lead me, but that’s where I’m starting. I’ll continue to write as The Goat Cheese Lady for now, and whatever the future holds, I’ll let you know. Our two boys are 14 and 11 and continue to be louder than my sister and I ever were. We have two dogs, Montaña and Flash, a cat, Jumpy, a flock of chickens and three goats. Yes, we still have Lucy, the goat who helped us start it all and was milked by over 1,000 people. She’s retired but still the boss. Chocolate provides enough milk for our family with some to spare for the dogs. Soccer friends, school friends, coyotes and mice are frequent visitors. There are way too many flies and every so often we see an owl. I’m glad you’re here. Sometimes you’ll laugh out loud, other times you’ll be inspired to appreciate the small things. My hope is that, over your morning cup of coffee or your afternoon work break, you’ll enjoy the antics and inspiration that are my daily life. Lindsey
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2 Responses to Day 114

  1. It also may flavor your milk from her and now your other girls for a short time too. A mistake we all make with goats at one time or another to breed them. Last year we had many to breed that were milking and I let our buck loose in the herd, and barn. Never again. The girls can visit his pen for sleepovers during that month and if I have one left with the buck I bathe her in Dawn Dish soap in the greenhouse on a warm day and blowdry.

  2. Melina says:

    It does fade….eventually. Or maybe you just get used to it.

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